This week

Hello all. Again it has been a very long time. Logan is doing phenomenally well and I am so grateful that Heavenly Father has answered my prayers and that everything has fallen into place. I am most grateful for him softening Davyd's heart so that Logan was and is able to get the treatment and education plan that he now has.

I am blessed in so many ways and seek to remember that always but for the last 6 yrs it seems to be one thing after the other.....Heavenly Father is really shaping me into the person that he wants me to be obviously ;). I am so much stronger than I ever thought possible.

I am not one that likes to complain about my physical health to others but I have been sick for years now. Constant low grade fevers, weakness, exhaustion, and lower abdominal pain, along with lots of female issues. Recently, the pain had gotten so bad that there were times that it took all I had to sit at work without crying. The pain felt just like my back labor with Logan. Because Dr's just told me that they thought I had fibermyalgia I decided to go to a new GYN because I knew that the problem was coming from there. I just knew it. Well finally a dr that listened and did a ultrasound and a biopsy....I have a chronic infection of the lining of my uterus that has gone on for a long time. I won't go into all of the details but I will be going in for a hysterectomy on Wed. I am relieved to know that I am not crazy and that there is a reason I have been feeling this way. Relieved to know that I will be well again but I am having mixed emotions about this. I am only 34 and still had the dream of perhaps remarrying eventually and having another baby one day. I know my clock was already ticking anyway.

I am concerned about how my kiddos will fair with me down for awhile.....this will be much different without a husband to help out and take care of me. Davyd will keep them some but I can't even drive for two weeks. I have to miss lots of work as well.

I had a wonderful blessing on Friday night and I feel much better about this. I feel at peace that this is what is supposed to happen. I am so grateful for the peace and comfort that I feel.